Hey, fellas! I started this thread for us to share a few well-needed laughs, something to lighten up the day when the fish aren’t biting or you just needed something to pick you up from a boring day. Let me start this up with a joke I heard from my cousin.
The New Farmer:
One day a guy was walking down the road and he came upon a man selling rabbits. He asked to buy one. The man sold him one and told him, “Around here, we call ’em peters.”
The man continued his journey and came upon a woman selling chickens. He asked to but one of those. The woman happily sold him a chicken, but told him, “Around here, we call ’em pullets.” The man thanked her and continued on his way.
Next, he saw a man selling a donkey. He decided he’d like a donkey and asked the man to sell it to him. The man agreed and told him, “Around here we call ’em asses. And he’s a bit stubborn sometimes and he’ll stop in his tracks, to get him moving again you just need to give him a good scratching.”
The man took the donkey and continued his stroll. After a few miles, the donkey stopped and wouldn’t move, so it was time to scratch the donkey, but he was having a hard time juggling the rabbit and chicken while doing it.
Then a nice woman saw he was having trouble and stopped to ask if he needed help.
He replied, “That would be great! Would you be so kind as to hold my peter and pullet while I scratch my ass?”
Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream ‘prejudice’ these days ….
A customer asked, “In what aisle can I find the Polish sausage?”
The clerk asks, “Are you Polish?”
The guy, clearly offended, says, “Yes I am. But let me ask you something.
If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?
Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?
Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?
Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?
Or if I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?”
The clerk says, “No, I probably wouldn’t.”
The guy says, “Well then, because I asked for Polish sausage, why did you ask me if I’m Polish?”
The clerk replied, “Because you’re in Walmart.”